4/21/17
Is this really my life? Lonely, solitary, monotonous?
I have been advised, "Let God row the boat". This advice is of little comfort to me, for what's the use of allowing God to row the boat if I have never left the shore? I am standing upon the banks of some body of water, watching other boats sail, row, drift beyond the horizon. I stand here, thinking of whether I shall eat carbohydrates tomorrow or nothing at all. Do I go to work tomorrow? If not, how shall I occupy my time?
I go to my email inbox to find it empty. I search for someone to whom I can write, and find no one. I think, "Sunday night I shall be alone.". I'd like to do something, but can think of nothing to do and no one with whom to do it. "How many sleeping pills do I have? I'll go to bed early".
No book holds my interest. Poems are banal, sentimental, ridiculous. Television and film are redundant, tedious, egocentric, blind.
"What do you read my lord?"
"Words, words words."
Food is also troublesome and unoriginal. "Nothing tastes".
Ideas, opinions, ideals--all meaningless.
History. Repetitious.
Is this really my life? Lonely, solitary, monotonous?
I have been advised, "Let God row the boat". This advice is of little comfort to me, for what's the use of allowing God to row the boat if I have never left the shore? I am standing upon the banks of some body of water, watching other boats sail, row, drift beyond the horizon. I stand here, thinking of whether I shall eat carbohydrates tomorrow or nothing at all. Do I go to work tomorrow? If not, how shall I occupy my time?
I go to my email inbox to find it empty. I search for someone to whom I can write, and find no one. I think, "Sunday night I shall be alone.". I'd like to do something, but can think of nothing to do and no one with whom to do it. "How many sleeping pills do I have? I'll go to bed early".
No book holds my interest. Poems are banal, sentimental, ridiculous. Television and film are redundant, tedious, egocentric, blind.
"What do you read my lord?"
"Words, words words."
Food is also troublesome and unoriginal. "Nothing tastes".
Ideas, opinions, ideals--all meaningless.
History. Repetitious.
